Helpless.   I hate feeling helpless.  Any time I face something I can't fix, that's how I feel.  It started when I was a little girl.  As some of you know, my sister developed epilepsy and started having seizures when she was 18 months old.  I would've been six.   I don't remember much about that time or the years that followed.   It's said that trauma can cause you to block out events and store them away in the recesses of your mind.  Children are especially prone to this because they don't have the coping skills to deal with them.


There are a few things that I do remember; such as the time when my sister was in Kindergarten and she started having seizures that wouldn't stop and the doctor told us there was no hope…helpless.  Another time when she was around eleven, she had ten seizures in one day.  All I could do was stand by and wait for them to pass…helpless.   This feeling of helplessness made me feel out of control and put me on a path of making sure I would do everything in my power to stay in control.   It got so bad that I would manipulate people and circumstances in order to stay in that place. 


I'm sure you can imagine how well that worked.  The harder I tried, the more out of control I felt because life happens to everyone and like it or not, sometimes there is nothing we can do to fix it.


Lately I've been battling with control again.  It's never really left but subsides if things are going my way.  I've had some physical issues lately that have triggered old feelings and emotions and it's made me feel that I was going backward which terrifies me.


Today I met with my counselor.  She asked me two things.   First she asked “Who's in control?”   I knew the right answer was God and that's what I told her but then she asked me “If Jesus were here, could you convince Him you believe that?”   I was dumbfounded and it took me several minutes to give her an answer and that answer was “no.”    I couldn't convince Him because I wasn't convinced myself. 


Oh, how I want to be convinced.  I'm not saying I've never trusted God because I have but I pick and choose when and how.  In the situation I'm facing now, it's one that I've fought Him for control all my life.  When Jesus gave His life for me, it was for all of me, not just for the pieces I would choose to accept.


Think of it this way.  Imagine an occasion is coming up and you knocked yourself out to make it beautiful.  Part of it involved making a lot of sacrifices to buy special gifts to hand out.   As you gave out the gifts, you noticed certain people pushing some of the gifts to the side and they left without taking them home.  I know I would feel sad and disappointed that what I had done was not enough.  This is what we do to Jesus when we don't surrender control in every area.


If you can relate, please join me in this prayer.   Father, I want to give You control in every area of my life.  Help me to recognize when I'm fighting You for it and release it.   You will never force me and it's my decision to make which I thankfully make now.  Dear God, help me to remember that You are with me wherever I go and You will always give me the strength I need in any situation.  Thank you for sacrificing Your only Son so I can walk in freedom from feeling the need to control.  Amen

What If

By Eileen Glotfelty • May 30, 2025
This is something I have asked myself for a long time. It usually goes something like this: What if I can't pay the bills? What if I get sick and can't take care of myself? What if I'm never free of the pain? You get the picture. I've always been the one on high alert and looking for trouble around every corner waiting for the other shoe to drop. The sad thing is that I didn't know there was another way…until now. Now I choose to look at the glass half full. It's not always easy because I was programmed in the negative for so long. It's a conscious effort to take a hold of those thoughts and turn them around but every time I do, the anxiety and fear is replaced with peace. For example, currently I'm on a flight to California. Never been there. Don't know the people I'm staying with. Everything fits into the category of “the unknown.” Normally I would be in panic mode but I've made the decision to turn the what ifs around from “What if the plane crashes? " to "What if I trust God to get me there safely?” “What if I don't know what to do when I get there and I feel awkward? to "What if I meet some great people who become special friends?” and one more: “What if I don't get what I came for and I return home disappointed? to "What if I am blessed beyond anything I can imagine and leave there better than I came?” As I encourage myself, I encourage you. You can do this. You know why…because God gave us His word and that's all we need. There are many that I hold onto but here are a few: “I will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Me because he trusts in me.” “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” Today is a new day full of what ifs. It all depends how you look at it. What if…

Armor of God

By angela • May 29, 2025
How to Put on the Full Armor of God: A Daily Guide for Every Believer All day, every day, an invisible war rages around us. A cunning, relentless enemy seeks to wreak havoc on everything that matters—our minds, emotions, families, and future. But as followers of Jesus Christ, we are not defenseless. We are equipped and empowered by the Holy Spirit to stand strong. In Ephesians 6:10–18 , Paul lays out the spiritual armor that God has given us. This post will guide you through how to put on your armor daily , so you're guarded against the attacks of the enemy and able to stand firm in Christ’s victory. Victory Is Already Won Before diving into each piece of armor, remember this: Jesus has already won . When He died on the cross and rose again three days later, He defeated every enemy. We don’t fight for victory—we fight from victory. Our strength and courage come from what Christ has already accomplished. The Belt of Truth The belt holds the entire armor together. Truth grounds us and reminds us of our identity in Christ . 🛡️ How to wear it daily: Start and end your day in God’s Word. Memorize Scripture. Speak truth out loud when Satan attacks. Replace the enemy’s lies with the unshakable truth of Scripture. The Breastplate of Righteousness We have no righteousness of our own. Christ’s righteousness is our covering. 🛡️ How to wear it daily: Live a life rooted in God’s Word. Choose integrity and purity in your daily walk. Protect your heart by killing the flesh and pursuing holiness. The Shoes of Peace Our firm foundation is the Gospel of peace . We are secure in what Jesus has done. 🛡️ How to wear them daily: Be a living example of Christ. Share your testimony and speak hope. Walk confidently knowing your future is secure in Him. The Shield of Faith Faith is what extinguishes the fiery arrows of the enemy. 🛡️ How to lift it daily: Trust in God's promises even when you can't see the outcome. Stay connected to other believers. Remember past victories to fuel your current faith. The Helmet of Salvation This is the most essential piece. Without salvation, there is no battle to fight—and no victory to win. 🛡️ How to wear it daily: Stand confidently in your identity as a child of God. Feed your mind with spiritual truth: listen to sermons, podcasts, and teachings. Be consistent in church attendance and worship. Even in the darkest storms, the certainty of your salvation will be your light and strength. The Sword of the Spirit This is our only offensive weapon —the Word of God. It is powerful, alive, and active. 🛡️ How to wield it daily: Read Scripture consistently. Make it a non-negotiable habit. When attacked, respond with Scripture—just like Jesus did when tempted in the wilderness. On hard days, immerse yourself in the Word. Take extra time if you need it. Let God's truth wash over you. The Power of Prayer Prayer is how we access God's strength. Without it, our armor has no power. Victory comes through prayer. 🛡️ How to pray daily: Pray the moment you open your eyes. Ask for wisdom, strength, and direction. Pray impulsively throughout the day—about anything and everything. Before bed, kneel and have a conversation with your Creator. Give thanks, seek comfort, and align your heart with His. Final Thoughts: Suit Up Daily Although the war has already been won , the daily battle must still be fought. The enemy doesn't take days off—neither should we. Thankfully, we have everything we need. The armor. The sword. The power of prayer. And most importantly, we have the presence of God Himself , who goes before us in every battle.  Suit up, believer. Stand firm. And walk confidently in the victory Christ has already secured for you.

Your Worst Enemy

By Eileen Glotfelty • April 25, 2025
“You are your own worst enemy.” How many times have I said that to myself? I've come to realize that although there's truth to it, there's something else that's even greater. It's name is shame. Shame is the enemy of our soul. We don't even realize it's there. It makes itself comfortable within us and settles in for the long haul. Shame becomes familiar and it rises up when we least expect it and knocks us off our feet. It likes to be in control. Shame has had a grip on me since I was a child. It started when I was bullied by other kids because of my weight. I was the brunt of jokes and a target for snowballs. Names like “Fatso” replaced my own and it didn't take long until I believed their lies. Shame has a voice. It says, “something's wrong with you. You're not good enough.” By the time I became an adult, it affected every area of my life. It stole my identity. I've spent my life trying to prove that I was good enough. I fell into the trap trying to be all things to all people. I took on responsibilities that were not mine to take as I tried to fix everyone's problems. Underneath it all was a desperate need to know I was loved and accepted. The more I strove, the more shame laughed in my face. I got to the place of brokenness where I physically walked with my head down. Shame thought it had won. I was at my lowest point and I cried out to God in desperation. I didn't see fireworks or hear the Hallelujah Chorus but an awareness started deep in my soul. I realized that what I needed most was not the love and acceptance of others but His love. What amazed me was I had it all along. I had heard about it. I knew it in my head but all my striving and need for control kept it from reaching my heart. I didn't need to earn it. It was there waiting for me to accept it. Now there's a transformation going on within me. It's not happening overnight. I still wrestle with shame but it doesn't have a grip on me. I walk with my head up and I'm learning who I really am. I'm learning to love myself because He loves me. It's a daily choice I have to make to turn to God and lean on Him. The power is in surrender. When I am weak. He is strong. There's no shame in weakness. Maybe your experience is similar to mine. Shame likes to hide so I would encourage you to pray for awareness and when you get it, surrender the striving and need for control. The shame will leave as it gets exposed and comes face to face with the Lover of our souls. It can't stand in His presence. The freedom and peace you long for are waiting.