Last night I happened to look at my Facebook page before going to bed.  I saw a post from a friend that made my heart ache.  Her beloved husband passed away suddenly at 40 years old leaving her and their nine year old daughter behind.  They are numb with grief and shock.  Grief is no respecter of persons.  It comes like a thief in the night. Twenty-two years ago I was in that place. 

People meant well but I found the ones who truly brought comfort were the ones who had been where I was.  They were the ones that knew what to say and sometimes they didn’t have to say anything at all.  They were just there.

Grief affects everyone but each of us will process it in our own way.  First comes the shock and then you go numb.  After that a myriad of emotions will surface such as sadness, loneliness, anger and depression.  You can stuff everything inside, but the best thing to do is feel the emotions.  Recognize them for what they are.  They are not a sign of weakness.  They are necessary for healing. 

The news of my friend’s husband brought back a flood of memories of how I immediately kicked into survival mode. I remember telling my children that we were not going to be mad at God.  That was denial in its greatest form.  Little did I know it was exactly what we needed to do.  It was bound to happen and it didn’t help to deny it. 

Many years went by before I realized how angry I really was.  I was angry at the doctors, myself, and my husband, but I was mostly angry at God because, after all, couldn’t He have prevented it?  I was good at telling people how powerful He was and I believed He could do anything ...so why didn’t He? 

I wrestled with this for a long time.  For the first ten years, I couldn’t even pray. My faith was so shaken. My children were crushed.  I was crushed.  All I could do was go through the motions pretending I still believed. People would come to me and ask me to pray for them and I felt like a hypocrite. 

As I said before, each one of us processes differently.  My children were grieving and I didn’t know what to do.  Laura was 10 when Rob died.  She was her Daddy’s little girl and suddenly there was a void I couldn’t fill.  Laura and I would get helium balloons and write messages to Daddy on them and then go outside and send them to heaven. We'd watch until they disappeared above the clouds. One of my other children shut down emotionally. He cried the day his father died and never again.  Every fiber of our faith was tested and some of us walked away from God for a long time. Some are still trying to figure it out to this day and I can’t help but wonder if they will ever reconcile with their grief.

Recently someone reminded me of this verse, “He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces, he was despised, and we esteemed him not.” Isaiah 53:3 

It's talking about Jesus. I never gave much thought to His human side. He has emotions just like us. He grieves, just like us. He knows what it's like to be sad and suffer pain. Somehow, this brings me comfort. It reminded me that everything we go through, He did too. He understands our pain and our grief because He's been there. He didn't have to but He did it for me and for you. I don't know anyone who would do that, let alone God. He did it out of love. 

If anything I said resonates with you, I encourage you to grieve. Talk with someone, write out your thoughts. Feel the emotions and then lay it all at the feet of Jesus because He understands. 

If you need support, there's an organization called Grief Share. They will come alongside you. It doesn't matter how long it's been. Grief has no timeline.  You'll never get over your grief but you will get through it.

Bird on A Pole

By Eileen Glotfelty • October 24, 2026
This story started one evening as I was visiting family in Colorado. I was sitting on their deck which looks out onto the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. Usually when I sit outside, my gaze is fixed on the mountains, but not this day. There is a church building on the other side of their backyard fence, and as I was looking out over the prairie behind it, something caught my eye. In the parking lot there was a flag pole. It stood about 25 feet high. At the top of the flagpole was a metal ball. My eye kept getting drawn back to that ball because I thought I saw something moving. I took out my cell phone camera and zoomed in on it. Turns out it was a little bird. As I watched this little creature, I was fascinated. The surface of the ball was not much bigger than the size of his body but there he sat like he didn't have a care in the world. He felt safe. I told God I wanted that kind of confidence. After a few minutes, I looked up and the bird was gone. In that moment I heard the Lord speak to my heart and say, “You already have everything you need to spread your wings and fly.” The only difference between me and that little bird was, he believed it. Each of us has a calling or a purpose. Mine is to share lessons I have learned to offer hope and encouragement to others. I didn't accept it for a long time because I felt unworthy. How could someone so broken be used to help others? It's because there is a God in heaven who loves us and created us for such a time as this. We don't have to be perfect. God uses the broken and the weak to shame the strong. He looks at the heart and only asks that we be willing. We just need to take that first step. My step may be different from yours and some of us will take baby steps, and that's ok. We will still be moving forward. So my friend, I'm talking to myself as I encourage you. We already have everything we need so let's lift up our heads, give Him the fear, the guilt, the shame, and spread our wings and fly!

The Last Straw

By Eileen Glotfelty • September 20, 2026
It was November 2001. The world was still reeling from grief with the effects of 911. Even though my world wasn't affected by 911, it was still reeling in grief.  The love of my life was lying in the hospital on a ventilator living out his last days. I didn't know how many were left and I was clinging to the fact that it wasn't too late for a miracle. On that particular day, I had gone to be with him. Every time I went, I would stand by his bedside and read Psalm 91 to him as tears rolled down my face. Psalm 91 talks about God being our refuge and our strength and how He covers us. He likens it to a bird tucking his young under his wing to protect it. It goes on to say how He gives us angels to guard us and toward the end He says, “He will call on Me and I will answer him. I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him.” (Psalm 91:4, 15 NIV) I didn't realize how I would soon see those words come to pass. When I left the hospital, I got in our old car that someone had graciously given us. It had seen its better days, but we were thankful. On that night, however, the engine decided not to turn over. It was the last straw and I sat there with grief and despair washing over me. I couldn't even begin to think what to do. It was maybe a few minutes later that I looked up to see a friend from church walking toward my car. She had come to visit my husband and saw me sitting there. She knew her way around cars and she was familiar with mine. Within five minutes she had me open the trunk and pushed a button that I didn't know existed. The car started immediately. Apparently it was a safety feature of some kind that cut off fuel to the engine. To say I was grateful is an understatement. Some would say it was a coincidence, but I say it was my God tucking me under His wing and delivering me in trouble. He led that woman who knew about the button in the trunk to be there at the right time. He saw my pain. He knew I had reached my limit, and He met me in my grief and despair. I hope my story will encourage you if you are facing an impossible situation. God knows. He never takes His eyes off of you. I learned that my last straw is not His. He will tuck you under His wing and bring you through.

Key to the Heart

By Eileen Glotfelty • August 9, 2026
Keys, you never see their significance until you lose one. A few years ago I was downsizing from a large home to a smaller, more manageable one. I lived in that house for 20 years and now that the kids were grown and gone, it was time to let it go. As I was sorting through years worth of “stuff,” I came across an old can full of keys. At one point, each of those keys had a specific purpose. Some unlocked doors, some unlocked cars and some unlocked things that are still a mystery to this day, but each one unlocked something that needed to be protected and kept safe. As I sat there looking at this container of keys, I had to decide whether to keep them in the hope that they would still be needed some day or to accept the fact that since they had been sitting in that can for years, unused, it was ok to throw them out. I chose the latter. All of us are holding onto a key, whether we realize it or not. It’s the key to our heart. That key is a precious gift. It was meant to be opened by one person and when we put it in the wrong hands, we walk away disappointed and broken. I’ve been there. Maybe you have too. I was reading in the book of Mark, Chapter 11, verse 17 (NIV), about Jesus turning over the tables in the marketplace. I used to think that it was because He was so offended that He let His anger take over. That’s true, but what He was actually doing was restoring order. A sacred place that He loved was being turned into “a den of robbers,” as Jesus called it. Something that was precious and sacred was being defiled and He was taking it back and making it right. This story made me see that it’s never too late to take back the key from those who didn’t deserve it and give it to the One who gave it to me. Jesus handed it to me when He died on the cross and He’s given me the choice to return it. Why haven’t I done it before this? Truthfully, it’s because I was afraid. I wanted control and I thought by giving it to Him, He would ask me to do things out of my comfort zone and love people that I didn’t want to love. I gave my key to the people I thought I could control and I would be safe. I’ve lived my life in chaos because of it. So Jesus, I give you the key to my heart. It’s rusty and bent Lord, but I know You can restore it. Forgive me for giving it to those who didn’t deserve it and looking for the love that only You could give me. Open my heart to Your will and put the broken pieces back together. If tables need to be turned over, turn them over. I surrender control to You. Help me to trust You and love You with all my heart.